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Mar. 16th, 2003

10:41 pm - Weekend

Well Hey how are you guys doing. I'm doing alright. My weekend was alright. I went shopping at my faviorte store. TARGET!!! I got a book and a few shirts and other little things. I even meet a few cute guys.

I didn't get the chance to visit any of my K.G. friends, while they where on Spring Break. I feel kind bad for it. But I am sure I will get to see them soon. until then I love them just the same.

That's it for now, more tomorrow. But I am going to bed because these meds are starting to kick in.


Current Mood: sleepysleepy

Mar. 14th, 2003

11:58 am - Vent

I am so stressed right now, I'm nit even sure what to do anymore. i feel like my life is never going to get any better and there is not much that I can do about that. I have been trying for the last week to get someone to take me to go and get job applications so that hopefully i will be able to geta job so that I can start to save money for college. I doesn't seem like that is ever going to happen.

Everyone is telling me ot not think that way, but I honestly can't help when everytime i turn around everyone is telling me or asking me to help them with this issue or that one.

It's even harder when my sister ask my mom to sign for her to get a lone from the back for a car and she says that she will do. I'm sitting here thinking what the fuck is going on. I am trying my hardest to do things the right way and all I get is "If I have time." I don't understand these people anymore. I am so tired of trying. I think I am going to just have to give up on the idea of ever going to college. I guess that it is not my destiny to have a cllege education, and that really hurts me.

Current Mood: depresseddepressed

Jan. 16th, 2003

09:05 am - A little Bord

Hey!!! How are you guys doing? I am doing pretty good I think. I am a little tierd though. I had a very exhausting day yesturday. I got up at about 7am and did 2 hours of yoga and then I went to class and and did some other random things before I came back here to study and then I went to dinner and then after that I went to the gym for about 2 hours and I ate dinner with some firends and I have passed out in my bed by 9pm.

So I'm back up doing the smaething again today. I am so deteramnied to lose this weight by June 16,03.

Well I have to get going I need to take a shower.


Current Mood: enthralledenthralled
Current Music: Whitney Houston: One of those days

Jan. 11th, 2003

02:36 pm - Donig really Good I think....

Hey how are you guys doing I'm doing pretty good. I ma just getting back from spending the alst 5 days with so friends and it was so much fun and relaxing I acully got to see a froend that I have not seen since August the 17. So that part was really great because she is on point!!!! By this I mean she is my thinperseption. She is about 5"2 and maybe 105 and she looks so good and inorder for me to get anywhere close to what she looks like I need to lose more than 90 pounds and that is my goal I have started weight watchers and that is going rally well for me, my goal is to be 124 by June and I think I can do it with a lot of hard work and determanation.

Well I gotta go


Current Mood: annoyedannoyed
Current Music: 3LW: Players gonna Play

Jan. 9th, 2003

12:22 am

Hi how are you guys doing? Everything is going great here. I am not new to the journal thing but I have decide to make a new journal becaus there are a lot of peole out there who have found my journal and are not very nice to be about the things that I say here. So i am going to do my best ot try and express myself here a lot more than I would in my other journal.

Most of this journal is going to be about my eating disorder and how I deal with it on a day to dAY bases. I some day hope that I will be free oth this disease. This disease is so painful and so private and it makes people wish that they could come out and say something but we don't because of the type of comments that we get. So we just hide into our world of pro-ana and sticking to our pro-ana sites becuase we are able to find people that we trust there and they understand what we are going through and they do not judge us if we make mistakes.

Well thats all I have to say for now.


Current Mood: goodgood
Current Music: Mariah Carey: Through the rain

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